F. Scott Fitzgerald famously observed that "there are no second acts in American lives", something which this year was also true of the Cotswolds leg of the 2026 FAS Rummage. With the Marines failing to get even a single player for Tuesday (and our numbers too low for an internal game), we were left with just five scheduled fixtures over three days, making this the briefest main tour in FAS history - and the most difficult from which to extract a contrived narrative arc.

The lack of cricket was matched, if not exceeded, by the lack of cricketers. Some perennials didn't even make it to the Cotswolds, most notably Chris Barras, whose tour preparation took the extreme form of a hip replacement - like Darth Vader, he's "more machine now than man" (although he has not, as far as is known, attempted to slice off his son's hand). Less dramatically, Jim Streeter had gone viral in the least welcome sense of the phrase; and it was reported that James Wyatt had been kidnapped by his family for some mysterious ritual referred to as "a holiday". Even making it on tour didn't count for as much as it used to as Joe White (slipped disc) and Faruk Kara (mysterious foot ailment) were effectively out of action, being reduced to making stationary appearances that at least extended their impressive streaks of consecutive seasons played.

It was thus perhaps better to think of the tour as an all-inclusive spa with full facilities (hot tub, sauna and cold plunge barrel now installed at Mill Dene to go with the pool) and fine-dining courtesy of our own Michelin-trained chef, Ben Kittow (of Kittow Dining). The cricketing side of things could hence be seen as a sort of tasting menu: the starters were the comfortable "give everyone a go" strolls against Madrid FAST and Bibury; for mains we had gripping last-over wins at Ship(s)ton and Fladbury; and then to finish there was the equivalent of food-poisoning in the form of a difficult to digest thrashing by Temple Grafton. (Contrived narrative arc: check.)

While the awards were once again left to the Kent leg in September, the likelihood of just a single game there meant that the runners and riders (or perhaps cads and bounders) were already readily identifiable from the tour averages:

• The clear star with the bat was George Bradford, with 101 undefeated runs in the form of two half-centuries (both of which ended in compulsory retirement); but a big innings by James Houlder (95 runs at 47.50), Harry Houlder (69 runs undismissed) or Toby Reynolds (63 runs undismissed) could make things interesting.
• The bowling appears to be two-horse race between Daniel Mortlock (6 wickets at 8.83) and Harry Houlder (5 wickets at 17.80, including the clear bowling performance of the tour with 4/30 against Shipton), with Hal Dare (4 wickets at 10.75) a possibility if he can repeat his Madrid four-for in Kent.
• While a Venn diagram of the above yields an intersection set with one element for best all-rounder (Harry Houlder, with 69 runs and 5 wickets - and a catch), Toby Reynolds also contributed meaningfully with both bat (63 runs) and ball (3 wickets at 20.67), so is another player incentivised to dominate in September.
• Even in the absence of Chris "BBF" Barras, we once again had strength in depth behind the stumps. But while Nigel Reynolds kept beautifully on a low-bouncing track at Bibury and James Houlder did heroically standing up to often wayward bowling at Temple Grafton, none of this could compare to Dave Kittow's threepeat, 'keeping through 85 overs in the heat across the three days of tour, completing a catch and three stumpings (on a tour where nobody else managed more than a single fielding dismissal).
• It follows that the fielding award can't be made on the grounds of statistics (at least at this stage), so it's a case of identifying either a key moment (e.g., Frosty's nipple-centric catch against Madrid, Tom Reynolds's ballerina-like pirouette at Bibury, or Michael Stockwell's diving catch at Fladbury) or quality out-fielding throughout, although the grounds were so hard and bumpy that just about everybody threw in plenty of mis-fields to go with the occasional successful stop. Prima inter pares here is perhaps Polly Streeter, who made her FAS debut at Fladbury (as we otherwise would have fielded through the heat with just ten players) and made numerous stops without which, according to Toby Reynolds, "we wouldn't have won the game".
• The most-improved young player is even trickier than the fielding award, given that the youngest repeat tourist was probably Tom Reynolds. If one were to ignore the implicit requirement that this not be the player's first tour then there were two very strong candidates from the Madrid recruits: Hugo Little, who's six-over spell of 0/21 gave us the early control we converted to a win at Bibury; and Teo Thistlethwaite, whose seven-over spell of 1/16 helped ensure we had a manageable chase at Fladbury. Or, if one were to ignore the more explicit "young" stipulation, Justin Bradford, George's father, would be a candidate: in his first four FAS games he scored 7 runs at an average of 3.50 and a strike-rate of 18.92; so to then hit the (admittedly tiring) Bibury attack for 31* off 32 balls was a factor of ten improvement on what had come before.
• Finally, the recently-instigated best performance award (won last year by Joe White for his heroic performance against the Exeter Exiles) at this stage seems to be Harry's to lose with his supreme effort as captain at Shipton where he took 4/30, including the opposition pro, and then saw us home with 48* off 45 balls - the only thing which could have made it more Stokes-like would have been to announce his own retirement in his delivery stride. Honorable mentions to Tom Hall (35 and 1/9 against Madrid), Cliff Dare (19 and 2/22 against Shipton), Toby Reynolds (51* and 2/22 against Bibury), Daniel Mortlock (4/11 against Bibury), Teo and Guy Thistlethwaite (combined figure of 13 overs, 4 maidens, 2/29 against Fladbury) and Dave Kittow and Nigel Reynolds (half-centuries batting together, also at Fladders).

The above doesn't include character of the tour or the binjuice award, but perhaps both were embodied by the third generaion Dares, specifically Hal and Jamie, who inherited most of the organisational duties this year. Hal in particular was a constant presence and imbued the Rummage with much of its character (although thankfully not its fashion sense, given his decision to attend the end-of-tour dinner in a bruise-coloured two-piece romper suit); and both found out just how hard it is to make this whole thing work ("welcome to the suck" was Cliff's detailed handover briefing). So huge appreciation to both Hal and Jamie for making the Rummage happen and for Cliff for allowing his home - or, now, wellness retreat and substance abuse recovery facility - to once again be taken over.

The Kent leg of the 2026 FAS Rummage will take place on the weekend of September 11 and 13, with one fixture confirmed and a second possible.